Thursday, May 26, 2011

Anniversary Reflections

I realized something strange lately. I almost never blog about my husband or my marriage. I'm not sure why. Goodness knows, after almost twenty-five years together, there's lots I could say on both subjects. And, since today is our 21st wedding anniversay, I think maybe it's a good time to remedy the oversight.

My husband
He's a good man. Handsome, strong, dependable, honest, kind, hard working, generous, patient, and constantly loving. He's also handy when it comes to most things (aside from cars - which is okay since my dad is great with cars), and happy to pitch in around the house. In fact, truth be told, he's a much better housekeeper than I am. He's a great cook (no, not just BBQs) and a terrific pastry chef. He loves his own family deeply, adores mine and has had the same best friend since he was a pre-teen. He never forgets birthdays and makes a point of calling or emailing each of his friends and family members on their special days. He's always volunteering for some organization or other. In his spare time, he likes to renovate, putter, read, and play guitar. And he's a terrific listener - which is a special gift in a family like mine in which everyone else likes to talk. Best of all, he genuinely seems to enjoy being with me, and does whatever he can to love and support me. And - even after all these years - he still puts his book aside to watch me get undressed for bed.  How sweet is that?

Our marriage
Twenty-one years (and nearly twenty-five since our first date.)  In this day and age, that's pretty impressive. We've worked and lived overseas and travelled to dozens of different places together. We've owned four houses, and the same number of cars. We've also had four cats (though never more than two at a time). We've lived in separate cities for extended periods. We've painted or renovated every apartment and house we've ever lived in. We prefer to buy art rather than furniture. We nearly always vote the same way. We never argue seriously about money since neither of us is particularly materialistic, and we sit down together at the end of every year to plan our charitable donations. We enjoy food shopping and cooking (when we're not otherwise too busy), hosting dinner parties with friends and family, attending folk and jazz festivals and eating out at least once a week.  We even run together now and then.

It hasn't all been an easy, of course. There have been bumps along the way, and more than once we've run hard into brick walls we didn't expect to face and weren't sure we could scale. But somehow we've survived to find ourselves here - on the first day of the rest of our lives - older, greyer, and a little more battle-scarred - but also wiser, more patient, and more determined than ever to find ways to move forward in life together.

So, here's to my husband and to our marriage. And here's hoping we have many more happy, healthy, adventure-filled years together. 

Happy Anniversary, love.


  1. I too wish you both many more years of married bliss, Jan & Luke. And I love your posts Jan, you're terrific and you've got a flair for writing ....telling it like it is in a very captivating and interesting way. Luv ya, ~Auntie Marg

  2. Thanks, Aunt Marg. Love you too.

  3. In talking about your husband you said that he "has had the same best friend since he was a pre-teen." I guess that's a pretty good marker of a good person. You and him are very lucky to have each other. Congratulations! And many more years of growing together, Ana Maria

  4. It is indeed, Ana Maria, and yes we're very lucky indeed. Thanks for your good wishes.