Risser's Beach Boardwalk on a balmy afternoon in January |
Tonight I opened the my draft novel, Murder in Camera, for the first time since November and reread parts of it hoping I'd feel inspired to start rewriting. I didn't. I'm just far too tired after a busy weekend of running, socializing and taking pictures.
Instead, I've decided to play along with a little game started by B.E. Sanderson over on her blog Tabula Rasa. The rules are simple. Post a snippet of your manuscript from a page ending in "7" and leave B.E. a comment so she knows you've done it. Below is a scene that starts on page 137. Hope you (and B.E.!) enjoy it.
* * * * *
"You don't remember being found,
the ride in the ambulance, nothing?"
"No, I guess I must have been out
cold. Judging by how my face looks, I'm guessing the guys who did this must
have come on to me pretty hard. Maybe my subconscious is blocking it
out." Not likely, thinks MacIntyre.
"So, there was more than one
guy?" Dana asks looking down at her notebook nonchalantly.
"Yeah - I mean, I guess. I don't
really remember that either."
"Amy, are you sure about
that?" Dana asks gently. "Whoever did this to you is a pretty nasty
character. If he - they - told you not to talk to police or threatened you in
some way, you should tell us. We can protect you and we need to find whoever it
was so we can stop them from doing this to someone else."
Amy listens carefully rubbing her
thumbs back and forth across the top of her phone nervously.
"I'd help if I could, officer,
but I really don't remember", she finally says. "Sorry but I really
can't help you."
"Amy," MacIntyre interjects
finally, "Did the nurses or police officers who were here earlier speak to
you about being examined for evidence that you'd been sexually assaulted."
Her cheeks flamed again.
"Yes, they did - and I told them
it wasn't necessary," she replies, defiant now.
"May I ask why? As I understand
it, the examination wouldn't be painful. I understand there are specially
trained nurses who could do the examination and take samples of whatever they
find."
"They wouldn't find anything,
Inspector. I wasn't raped."
"How do you know, Amy?"
Dana asks softly. Amy's eyes widen and begin to well up with tears. "I
would know if I was raped," she says again more forcefully. "I'm a
virgin so I would definitely know if some guy had had sex with me when I was
out of it - so I know for sure I wasn't raped."
"Okay, Amy. If you're sure,
that's fine. I just wanted to make sure someone had discussed it with
you." MacIntyre voice is reassuring. "One last thing, Amy. By any
chance, have you ever registered with a website called 'Working It'? I
understand it's a site where aspiring models post photographs and information
about themselves so that photographers in hopes of being offered modeling
jobs."
Her face which had been flush moments
ago was suddenly pale again.
"No," she said faintly, her voice barely audible, "why do you
ask?"
"It's just that several local
women who've been attacked in recent months claim they met they were attacked
by men who approached them via Working It. I wondered if the same might have
happened to you, that's all."
"God, no, Inspector. My dad
would kill me if I did something like that. He and my mom are devout Muslims. They let me live like pretty much any other Canadian girl but there
are limits. And there's no way he'd approve of me modeling - especially if it
meant wearing skimpy clothes."
"I see. Okay, then, Amy. Well, I
just wanted to check. Constable, why don't you get Ms. Haddad's personal information
for the file? I'm just going to step up the hall to the waiting area to make a
phone call. Thanks very much for speaking with us, Amy. I hope you feel better
soon."
When Dana joins him a few minutes
later, MacIntyre is just ending his phone call.
"Thanks, Toby." Then, to
Dana, "So what do you think? Did you believe her?"
"No. You?"
"No. That's why I excused myself
when I did. I wanted to get Toby to check to see if she had a Working It
profile before she has a chance to delete it."
"And does she?"
"He thinks so. He found one for
a Amy H in Halifax and the description matches. He's sending me a link now so
we can take a look. Here it is."
MacIntyre fiddles with his phone for a minute, then hands it to Dana.
"So why did she lie to us?"
asks Dana.
"Presumably, because she doesn't
want her parents to know what she'd been up to while they've been out of the
country."
"And, of course, she wouldn't
want them to know she'd been raped either."
"She likely figures what she
doesn't remember - or chooses not to remember - won't hurt them."
"You think she does
remember?"
"Yes. From her injuries, I'd say
she fought back - meaning she was with it enough to realize what was happening
- unlike most of the other cases we know about."
"So we finally have victim who
could testify about what happened to her but won't because she doesn't want her
parents to know."
"Seems like."
"Well, that really sucks."
"Yeah, Constable, it does."
"So what's next?"
"Let's see what Toby's got for
us and go from there."
Thanks for playing along, Janice. That's a good snippet you've got there. I'm interested in seeing where this goes. Good job! =o)
ReplyDeleteThanks! I'll be interested to see where it goes too. It's going to be tough to untangle and reweave all the threads I've created so the final story makes sense. Guess that's why I've been procrastinating.
DeleteGreat snippet, Janice! I love the premise of this story - hope you get inspired soon :)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Janet. I hope I get inspired too - though it's going to take more perspiration than inspiration to finish the darn thing.
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